Earthquake sa Cebu

The floor was shaking and the glass along the wall was rattling.. I looked at my seatmate. We were all frozen. Then someone shouted: DOWNNNNN…

As seatmate and I scrambled fast to get under the table, something hit me on my head. I thought the roof was falling down. It turned out to be my earphone…

While under the table, my heart was beating so fast. I thought of the possibility of dying any second and I was like “Oh wow, no jerjer (sex) forever and ever? I can’t die just yet”.

When the walls finally stopped rattling, again someone screamed: OUT!!!

While some co-workers were busy getting their purses to bring with them, I just bolt heading for the door. I have never run so fast in my life. I run for safety. I run for the possibility of future jerjer.

If I were an Animal…

I was thinking. If I were an animal, what would I be?

A Bear!

I’m cute, cuddly and kids love me (I hope) after all.

But of course, I don’t believe that I’m an animal. Do animals discuss/ think /worry debate about after life? I don’t think so. I’d like to see a praying mantis NOT devouring her partner before or after sex because it is a SIN.

Do you believe you are an animal?

7 Things You Might Not Know About Human Sexuality

I attended a seminar on Human Sexuality once and the speaker was a doctor in her 60s who lost her voice in the middle of her lecture. While grasping for water, she said: “I lost my voice because of SEX”. Nyahaha.

Though it was mostly a reading session by the doctor (she just read whatever is in her slide), I find her funny in a way that I can never picture out my granny talking about such topic because most oldies in Philippines considered it as taboo.

I’ve never had sex education where we get to practice how to use the condom as what I’ve seen in US of A so I had that expectation for this seminar but I was wrong. The doctor said that it’s a “wholesome” seminar.

Anyway, here are 7 NEW things I’ve learned from the doctor that I wanted to share:

1. Benefits of SEX includes increase of immunity, reduce the risk of prostate cancer and relieve stress.

2. Bicycle riding for a long time is one of the traumatic causes for erectile dysfunction (ED); therefore ride something else if not someone else during weekends?

3. Menopause is a good thing because it helps prevent the woman from having babies in their later years.

4. OLD people still have SEX – performance may slow but the sexual desire never diminishes.

5. Urinary bladder closes prior to orgasm to prevent mixing of urine and semen.

6. A guy asked why his penis hardens every morning and the doctor said that it’s because he has a brain. It seems the source for all things sexual is the BRAIN and not the genitals.

7. Doctor usually prescribe Viagra (about 800 pesos) for those who suffers ED. Another substitute is 50 mg Andros, a Philippine version of Viagra which cost only about 200 pesos. Five tablets would be good enough for 5 months.

P.S. Sex for Brain .gif file was stolen from buzz museum.

Love Triangle of the Year – Goodbye Facebook

I’ve deactivated my facebook account for the nth time and I got a feeling it’s going to remain deactivated for quite a long time if not forever. WHY?

There was a shooting news last month in one of the malls in the country that got a bit of media attention due to the circumstances of death. It turned out that 13 year old boy shot his 16 year old boyfriend in the head due to jealousy with another guy before shooting his own head too.

Is this THE love triangle of the year or what?

I read this in the news but didn’t really give much attention to it until I received an email with pictures of the minors involved that were taken from Facebook. People could be a bit cruel sometimes with their side commentaries and all that which is really their business anyway except that it made me realized that I don’t want to have an active Facebook account when I’ll die. And since I don’t know exactly when I’ll die, I’ve had my facebook deactivated in advance.

I know! I’m weird that way.

Speaking of being an internet addict, one of the news I’ve read is that text and internet addict people are more prone to getting HIV / Aids. You can read about this juicy piece of news in detail from Yahoo Philippines.

I didn’t realize that there are people who are into casual sex with multiple partners which were previously arranged via text messages and internet.  I guess some might find this exciting perhaps but considering the consequences, are you really willing to take the risk?

But then again, young people seem to have this feeling of being an “immortal” and that all this talk about HIV and other problems are nothing but media / religious hype.

At least until they get sick and die.

And when they do, I wonder if they will ever say or think…

I wish I had a relationship with my hand instead!

How To Catch A Cheating Partner

A friend’s friend’s intuition told her that her husband was cheating on her and she was right OF COURSE.  On top of that, the other woman was pregnant and the husband got a nerve to accuse his wife for being the cause of his infidelity. Now, adultery is ILLEGAL in Philippines. This means that if caught on the act, the innocent party has the right to file a case against the guilty couple that could possibly send them both to jail.

Tricky question is HOW TO CATCH THEM?

Milay, our resident expert on all things supernatural has this one advice to give. Smear a Pawikan’s saliva (sea turtle) on the guilty partner’s underwear/shirt. WHY? Apparently, some Filipinos believed that this will cause a woman’s vaginal muscle to compress down on the male organ during sex resulting to penis’ captivity.  WHAT THE ?!@#$

Just make sure you don’t engage in this carnal activity with your own husband when he is wearing the sea turtle’s saliva or you might find yourself a victim of your own medicine.

I am not sure how effective and how long a sea turtle’s saliva’s power will last but it’s amazing that there are people who actually believe on this stuff. I guess there’s no harm on trying and if ever you did, please don’t forget to let me know how it worked out.